


i walk my days on a wire

by averyroswell



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Character Study, Gen, an au where juno's the chosen one instead of leo, ish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-20
Updated: 2019-03-20
Packaged: 2019-11-26 09:21:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18178790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/averyroswell/pseuds/averyroswell
Summary: Juno used to be a kid with a collection of colored pencils and a too-big red Jansport, who’s talents were drawing horses, cleaning up people’s bruises, and remembering the names of every cartoon character you could think of.Now, she is a knight.





	i walk my days on a wire

**Author's Note:**

> art by the AMAZING cutiecryptidz https://cutiecryptidz.tumblr.com/post/183588307488/you-are-quite-alright-now-my-name-is-minerva

Juno Divine is six, with short, dark curls and chubby cheeks and an affection for mud. These things Minerva learns when Juno throws a bucket filled with water and dirt and leaves directly at her upon her arrival.

“Greetings, Juno Divine!” Minerva sputters, the muck flying right through her body.

“Hi,” Juno says, and walks right through the projection to get her pail. “‘m Juno!” She sits back down. “Sorry for throwing a bucket at you.” She scoops up a handful of clouded water from the river and dumps it in.

“You are quite alright! Now, my name is Minerva! What is that you are doing, Juno Divine?”

“Potion,” she says. Picks up a stick from the ground and very carefully stirs. “Could you pass me the shovel?”

“I- um, yes,” Minerva squats down. “Is this one..?”

“This one,” Juno points to a flower pot with cracks, a few pieces of silverware, and a little bit of paint. Minerva passes over a spoon.

Juno pours some green paint in little by little, stirring as she goes. “Watch the- the- the different textures.” she instructs. Minerva looks. A few moments pass, and Juno says, “Look, it's like a tree stump! With the, the moss and the dirt and wood stuff!”

Minerva looks around the forest. “So it is!” she praises, eyeing over the bucket.

Juno swirls it around a few more times. “It’s magical. When I make this the trees grow faster, and when I put it in the creek the plants in the water get stronger.” She nods very seriously.

“That is very impressive!”

“So, where did you come from?” Juno asks conversationally, picking her pail up by the sides.

“I am of Miralaviniax Orbital Body 5!”

“Oh, cool. I’m of Mark Cotta Elementary School.” Juno dumps the bucket out into the river and dries her hands on her overalls. “Can you help me find another mud puddle?”

* * *

Nine years later, Juno wakes up to the end of the world.

Her room’s got a big window, thrown open by the force of the harsh wind. It whips at her face and hair, and she wraps her blanket tight around her shoulders before leaning closer, to get a better look. Her teeth are chattering and her arms ache with the effort to stay standing- it feels like she's being sucked into- something. She peers outside.  
It’s like the ground has opened up. There’s an _emptiness_ , to dark for Juno to look right at. It's a sinkhole, sucking her neighborhood into its mass.

Juno kicks open the door, cursing as she goes. She darts her head in her parent's room. The floor is shaking, a bookshelf falls to the ground. She pushes past the wreck as best as she can, sees her parents are gone, and _screams_.

She ducks out and into the hallway, furiously flinging open other doors with speed and effortlessness that she only half notices, searching for anything, anyone, and the ground shakes, and the floor collapses, taking Juno with it.

Juno wakes up with a gasp. The pillow in her lap falls off the bed.

“Greetings, Juno Divine!” a booming voice shouts.

Juno looks up to see a spectral, glowing figure, who might be blue if she squinted, and she says, “Um.”

“My name is Minerva!”

“Um?”

“Surely you remember me!” the figure continues. “I visited you once before, when you were very young!”

“Yeah, except that was a dream? I mean…”

“You were making a potion?” Minerva elaborates helpfully.

Juno pushes her hair back. “Yeah, I'm… alright. Hi, I guess.”

“Hi! I am here to tell you that you have been chosen to fulfill a fate of cosmic importance!”

“Yeah- hey did you make that sinkhole thing happen? Why did that feel so real? And like- who? Are you?”

“I am Minerva!”

“Yeah, I got that part-”

"Your world is imperiled, Juno Divine. It is besieged by a supernatural threat that would spell certain death for the lives of your neighbors, friends, and loved ones, and would do so without hesitation or remorse. You have been called, Juno Divine, to do what others cannot."

“To fight them?”

“No- god, no, to protect your world!”

“Um.”

“There is no need to fear this task! You will be imbued with the strength of ancients, outfitted with the mightiest armaments in existence, and trained by one of the greatest warriors this universe has ever known, me!”

Minerva extends her hand out towards her.

“...yeah,” Juno rubs her eyes and shakes the figure's hand. “This is- yeah.”

* * *

 

Minerva’s been showing up for a little while every day, mostly to make sure Juno’s been doing her homework, (“A warrior must be well-rounded!” “Yeah, but I don’t see what trigonometry has to do with anything.” “Just let me see it.”) and spar with her. One day after a match, Juno asks, “So… is this all there is?”

“Hm?” Minerva looks up, from where she’s crouched on the grass.

“Like, is something gonna happen any time soon?” Juno clarifies. She cracks open a root beer.

Minerva laughs. “There is no need to be impatient! Someday you will be thankful for this peaceful time!”

“I’m not- you call sparring every single day peaceful? Do you even think I need all this practice?”

“...yes?”

“Minerva-”

“Listen.” Minerva stands up and puts her hands on Juno’s shoulders. “Something is coming. And I need you to be ready.”

“But-”

And Minerva disappears.

* * *

 

“Oh, excuse me, miss, I think you dropped something,” says Officer Pearson, casually shoving Juno into the brick wall behind the post office.

“Um,” Juno begins.

“So,” the police chief, _who just elbowed her into a wall,_ says cheerfully, “I'm here to give you a deadly weapon.”

Juno was on her way to the post office to deliver a package to an aunt, for her mom, but. “Okay?”

Officer Pearson studies her face. “Did Minerva not-? Well, that's irresponsible of her! So, hello, my name is Leslie-”

“I don't think I can legally call you that?”

“I won't arrest you,” Leslie says, and smiles. “I was Chosen, like yourself. Um, about-” she counts on her fingers. “About 30 years ago, now! How the time flies! So, I'm here to give you your weapon,” she digs through the mail bag she's carrying, “It's, uh, it's name is Aloysius,” she clumsily hands it over to Juno.

It's a crossbow the size of her arm. Dark blue.

“Um.”

“Try it!”

“O-okay?” Juno stumbles under its weight. To her horror, the thing seems to be _vibrating._ “It’s, uh, it’s great. Just great. Who- who are you again?”

“Leslie Pearson,” the officer says, flashing her badge, “Uh, fellow Chosen one? I used to work at Woolworth’s-”

“Okay. Can I… can I rename him?”

Leslie falters. “I- what?”

“Like, can I change its name. The crossbow's.”

“I, uh, I don't think so?” Leslie taps her chin and shrugs. “Go for it!”

“Uh,” says Juno, who didn't think she'd get this far, “Sebastian.”

“Sebastian?”  
“I dunno,” Juno shrugs. “I watched The Little Mermaid at the cinema yesterday.”

“I see, I see.”

Juno lifts up the crossbow, eyeing it doubtfully. “Can you show me how to… hold this?”

Leslie obliges.

* * *

“So do you… talk?” Juno asks awkwardly. It's night, and she's standing by her dining table over Sebastian.

The crossbow makes, like, nineteen chirping sounds.

“Oh my god,” Juno drags her hands down her face. Then; “Wait. Is that…” she leans closer. “That Morse code?”

Eight pleased clicks.

Fifteen minutes later, she's searching around on her computer _how to understand morse code_ , _what is morse code, what time does the library open_ , Sebastian set beside her.

“Okay,” she says a moment later, “Uhh, say something.”

Seventeen chirps.

“Can you… repeat that?” It does, and she writes them down carefully, typing them into a translator. “Is that- _Sebastian!”_ It translates to ‘pussy.’ The crossbow vibrates laughingly.

* * *

 

Through a frosted window, we see the back-lit shadows of people in a restaurant. It's New Year's Day, Y2K, and inside Jenn's Diner patrons are heralding the new year. We see a few people at the bar up front sharing drinks and laughing, a woman flirtatiously sharing phone numbers with a waitress, a man wearing ridiculous red glasses, a little boy curled up asleep in the lap of his mother.

We see a tired woman with scars and strong arms nursing a large black coffee, and a man with kind eyes and a nice flannel, talking quietly. The man in the glasses opens up a menu-

-and Juno wakes up, chest heaving. This vision is the first of many.

* * *

 

Juno's recently joined the Monongahela State Forest as a ranger, and Minerva’s never been prouder. She has a professional uniform, a cool flashlight, a badge, a reasonable schedule, and a decent salary. Juno's proud of herself, too.

She pours coffee into her thermos and leans against the office's desk, stirring creamer in with a plastic knife. “Alright, Minerva,” she says. “What have you got for me.”

Minerva immediately materializes. “I have something important to show you, Juno Divine! Deep in the forest. Your patrol is soon, is it not?”

Juno takes another sip and grabs her walkie-talkie, puts it on her belt. “Yeah, it's starting in a couple minutes.” She dives under the desk and fetches Sebastian, who chirps a cheerful hello and vibrates under her touch. “You gonna tell me who it is?”

Minerva says nothing. Juno slips outside, slinging the crossbow over her shoulder.

Ten minutes later, she’s walking around in Monongahela, lit by a flashlight but mostly Minerva’s otherworldly glow. She’s lead into a grassy meadow, where the moonlight is reflecting on these stone slabs, two of them standing up and a third on top, between them.

She's got a Mitski song playing in one earbud, which she takes out when the gate's in sight. “Is that…” she leans closer. “That a Stonehenge thing?”

inerva's silent, and when Juno turns, she finds her spectral figure is gone. She sighs and faces the gate again, deftly loading Sebastian with a bolt. The crossbow chirps a worried _, be careful._ Juno drops her flashlight and steps into the moonlight, leaves crunching under her boots.

She reaches the gate with quiet reverence, touching it with a shaking hand. It's surprisingly warm under her fingers, the stone smooth. Sebastian vibrates nervously.

Juno steps back after what feels like an hour and clears her throat. “What-”

“This is the reason you were Chosen, Juno Divine.” Minerva says quietly. She's back. Juno's not surprised. “This is the gate to another world, and your job is to… protect it. Don't let anything happen to it, don't let anyone get to it, at any cost.”

“What if something does happen to it?”

“All would be lost.”

She visits every week to sweeps up the leaves.

* * *

 After a few minutes of deliberation, she knocks on the door.

“Hiiii, Ranger Newton,” Juno sings, leaning on Sebastian, after Duck opens the door. She grins off his shocked expression. “We should probably talk.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr at @moschicanes


End file.
